This went around last year and I know I thought about it but decided to go with the phrase live, laugh, love and for me that's been very difficult. I haven't talked about this too much as I tryed to stay positive as much as possible but I have been really depressed this past year. The search and lack of job for me had hit me really hard. I was feeling like I'd let everyone down. I was feeling guilty, lonely and basically really bad. I was constantly on the edge. My family has been wonderful dealing with me and truly I'm so grateful to them. But laughing and taking on life and just living, it wasn't happening. I wasn't able to let go. If you've ever been there you know just how bad you feel. I was nowhere near as bad as some but I still struggled some days to do anything much. You realise how much time you waste when you get home and realise you have to leave again to pick the kids up and all you have achieved is 10 episodes of NCIS.
Oh gosh! This post has gone where I wasn't intending it to go but I want to talk about this with you. Because at home I really struggled to talk about it I just became more angry and isolated.
So with all the changes in my life over the last month I wanted to talk about my changed outlook. I look forward to the day ahead. I view it as a challenge a fun one. I'm smiling and laughing more. Yes I'm tired but it's a good tired. I feel much more like me. Next year I want to keep this going. Work is long hours but it's fun. The people are nice and it's a good challenge. I want to keep this feeling going. Something to make me look forward. To set goals for the future and feel like I can!
I've thrown words around something that is the goal for me next year.
All these are great words but they didn't quite work for me and now I have to decide what calls to me!
In the end it all came down to one word. This coming year will be ALL about one word for me. That word is
LEARNI know next year is going to be a year of learning. Learning with my job and absorbing all that I can. Learning how to let go and be happy with where I am. Learning how to make lots of clothes. Basically I want to take all the opportunities that come my way to branch out and learn and be amazing. I want to take those opportunies and move forward.
So what is you year going to be?
Next year is going to be Awesome :D Join me for the fun!